Backbiting One of the Gravest Sin In Islam

“O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful.” (Quran 49:12). Allah likens the act of backbiting, to consuming the flesh of one’s dead brother in the Quran. This shows us in simple terms, the gravity of this sin in Islam.

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Backbiting, also known as “gheebah” in Arabic and “gheebat” in Urdu, is of the most heinous sins. There are extensive verses and traditions in the Holy Quran and Prophetic Hadith about it. An extremely repulsive act to partake in, backbiting also has severe consequences for a person, with Allah detailing the various types of strict punishments for people who engage in it.

The danger of backbiting is that it is one of the easiest sins to commit for a Muslim. We may not always even be aware of when we are doing it. Talking behind others’ backs is something that has become very prevalent nowadays. Thus, it is almost seen as something normal. Muslims have to ensure that they are aware regarding this and refrain from engaging in it as much as possible.

The Prophet (PBUH) said, “During the Mi'raj (the Night of Ascension), I saw a group of people who were scratching their chests and faces with their copper nails. I asked, ‘Who are these people, O Jibril?’ Jibril replied: ‘These are the people who ate the flesh of others (by backbiting) and trampled people's honor.’” (Sunan Abi Dawud)

Methods of backbiting

This evil act can be perpetrated in several ways. Many commonly accepted forms of speech in society nowadays amount to backbiting.

The primary and most prevalent form of gheebah is talking about a person in a negative way behind their backs. If this would offend him if he were present, then it’s a form of backbiting. Comments about one’s appearance, habits, choices, lifestyle, work, relatives, or anything of the sort can be deemed gheebah. 

The Prophet (PBUH) said, “Backbiting implies your talking about your brother in a manner which he does not like.” (Sahih Muslim)

Backbiting is most often done in gatherings. However, it may also be committed in writing, e.g., over the internet, such as via social media. Mocking and insulting people are examples of this sinful act. The Prophet (PBUH) said, “If (that failing) is actually found (in him) what you assert, you, in fact, backbit him, and if that is not in him, it is a slander.” (Sahih Muslim)

Hence, we can see that many forms of negative talk about people while they are not present constitute gheebat. There are some subtle forms of this sin also, that should be avoided. For example, exposing someone’s sins with the pretense of doing it to oppose the sin, while in reality, the aim is to show that the person committing it is in the wrong. 

Another way that people convince themselves about this is when they share information on someone’s actions then advocate that the action is wrong; if the aim were to focus on the action, then it would be wiser to not focus on a specific person.

Causes of backbiting

This problem is often developed at a young age. It begins with parents and family members engaging in the act. Hence, a child sees it as something normal and slowly begins to adopt it, not realizing its sinfulness. So, if a child isn’t raised according to Islamic values, there is a high chance of him developing this trait.

Another problem that can cause this is bad company. This can happen during one’s childhood, all the way to old age. Backbiting is a widespread sin, even amongst Muslims who don’t realize its depravity. Even Muslims with a good upbringing can fall into this since the methods of committing gheebah can be subtle. Peer pressure may also play a role. The characteristics of those around them easily influence humans.

Socializing is another seemingly innocent occupation that can have dire consequences with backbiting. Gossiping is one of the most common methods of backbiting. Often, people gather together and have no other form of discussion for “entertainment” other than running people down or discussing their faults. This form of “entertainment” is entirely impermissible.

One more cause of gheebat is being arrogant, or jealous and envious of others. Arrogance makes people develop a superiority complex, whereby they feel that others are inferior beings. That, in turn, makes people think that it’s OK to speak ill of someone else. Jealousy of other people can also cause bitterness in humans, which may also result in backbiting.

In some cases, gheebah may simply be due to a person’s lack of knowledge of Islam and its values. Therefore, they can improve after being taught. Alternatively, it can be due to a lack of faith. In such cases, it’s essential to work on building up a person’s emaan.

When backbiting is permitted

One of the cases where it’s permissible to speak about someone’s sins or defects is when they publicize the matter themselves. For example, someone who is guilty of consuming haram things and does not attempt to hide it. In such a case, the person himself has publicized his haram action. Hence, there is no harm in talking about it without mentioning any other things that may not be publicly known.

Another case where gheebah is allowed is when someone is applying for a job or getting married. In such cases, a person who knows the potential employee or spouse can inform the concerned persons about his/her shortcomings. This is not considered as talking behind someone’s back – instead, it is a way of protecting Muslims. It is in everyone’s interests for the community to be safe.

When a person is oppressing someone, it is perfectly fine for the oppressed person (and others in the know) to complain to those in authority. The oppressor’s poor qualities can be highlighted to strengthen the case. The aim here is for the oppressed person to get justice and for the oppression to come to an end. As a result, it’s a praiseworthy cause.

Speaking behind someone’s back is also allowed when the discussion aims to help that person. So, a sinner’s sins can be discussed, if the point of the discussion is how to help him stop committing that sin. It is also permissible when the person is committing a sin which has the potential to harm others. Hence, it will be a type of warning.

In all these cases, it is usually sins and a person’s actions that are the focus. It is never permissible to make fun of someone’s looks, etc.

Ways to inhibit backbiting

This category of the topic is closely related to the “causes of backbiting” section. Essentially, we have to make sure that the cause is stopped. Hence, for parents, the most important thing is to make the child aware of the gravity of the sin from a young age. We must also ensure that we are careful ourselves, and are not mistakenly engaging in it.

Another critical factor in stopping this act from occurring is to be mindful of the company we keep. It is almost impossible to be friendly and close to sinful people who aren’t mindful of this act themselves while refraining from it. Prevention is better than cure. So, we need to avoid groups of gossip and negativity, as well as people who are likely to engage in this activity.

Another method for us to improve on this front is to ensure we have adequate Islamic education on the topic. Many of us don’t know the gravity of backbiting and take it lightly. It’s imperative to know about it, such as the Quranic verse about “eating the flesh of one’s dead brother.”

To avoid backbiting, we must also build up our own character. We must not look at others with envy. We should always be content with Allah’s decree and not worry about what blessings others may have. The constant drive for self-improvement should be there, and not talking ill of others should be a top priority.

Finally, we must also keep our own flaws in mind. We all have problems and weaknesses; how would we feel if someone spoke about them behind our backs? The Prophet (PBUH) said, “He who believes in Allah and the Last Day must either speak good or remain silent.” (Sahih Muslim)

Seeking forgiveness

If the evil deed is already done, then we must focus on repentance. “O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.” (Quran 39:53). All sins besides shirk can be forgiven by Allah, since He is al-Ghafoor, i.e., The All-Forgiving.

The most important thing for a regretful person to do is first to stop committing the sin. Then, he should have remorse for having done it and develop a firm resolve not to commit it again. Beseeching Allah for forgiveness is a must. The ideal time to do this is during sujood/sajdah of the daily prayers.

He should also ask for forgiveness from the person whom he has wronged if the person is aware of what he has done. If the person doesn’t know about the evil deed, then the backbiter should remain quiet. Instead, he should pray for the person who he spoke ill of and ask Allah to bless him.

“The Messenger of Allah passed by two new graves, and he said: ‘They are being punished, but they are not being punished for anything major. One of them was heedless about preventing urine from getting on his clothes, and the other used to walk about spreading malicious gossip.’” (Sunan Ibn Majah)